Newark Bears: Beyond the absurd

 by Jim Hague

By now, you’ve seen me post items on this blog about my former employers, the Newark Bears baseball team, an organization I resigned from in late June because of the absurdity of team owner Danielle Dronet and her supporting cast of hooples, who have absolutely no clue how to run a dishwasher, nevermind a professional baseball team.

Well, over the last two days, the absurd turned into the ridiculous.

For one, the website posted as a main link yesterday this insane post. I mean this appeared over anything else on the site.

It read in bold letters: EARTH QUAKE UPDATE!!! (yes, making earthquake two words).

Continuing, it read: “Any parents that have their kids at our youth baseball clinic today, the kids are fine. They are having lunch with the players. We kept them on the field during the earth quake. If you have any additional concerns and can’t each (sic) me through phone, please e-mail at…”

I won’t put the bastion of brilliance’s e-mail address on here.

Can you imagine? There was a little tremor, a little shake that wasn’t felt throughout the entire state, but we have to report that the kids at the Newark Bears clinic are alright. Yes, the kids are alright, Roger Daltry. Isn’t that great news? And they were kept on the field while the ground was apparently shaking. Another act of brilliance.

Now, if you continue on the website, you’ll see that there will be “The September Takeover” concert of some sort Sept. 24, featuring a host of hip-hop and rap artists I’ve never heard of like the immortal Heavy Hitter DJ Wallah, Wacka Flacka, the legendary (of course) Slick Rick and Murda Mamis 1st Lady. Tickets are $35 and $55 for this debacle and can be purchased somehow.

Of course, this has nothing to do with baseball. In fact, the entire website pretty much has nothing to with baseball.

But the organizers finally topped themselves. They’re organizing a Mothers Against Drunk Driving night, honoring coach Jim Leyritz, who was acquitted of vehicular homicide for driving while intoxicated and killing a woman in Florida. And get this (you cannot make this stuff up), they’re doing this on the same night as a Beer Pong Tournament on Thirsty Thursday. Hey, let’s hope the beer is good and cold that night.

But hey, they’re going to present the MADD people with a check for $2,000. Isn’t that special?

Seriously, what in the world is Danielle and her cronies thinking? It’s already an event that has been so totally bashed in the Star-Ledger and even on Boomer and Carton on WFAN this morning.

I just don’t know how absurd these people can get, but it’s certainly beyond comprehension now. Baseball? Furthest thing from their minds.

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The Mets, who are stumbling and stammering worse than your neighborhood drunk, got a four-run lead for Mike Pelfrey today. And what did the licker do? Give up three runs in throwing an ungodly 42 pitches in the second inning, a frame that lasted almost an hour. Pelfrey is no longer a joke. He has to go. He’s dreadful.
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I just love how the Republicans are all over the fact that President Obama is on vacation.

They’re saying, “How could Obama be on vacation with the country in financial crisis?”

Even better, “How could Obama play golf when we had a national disaster yesterday with the earthquake?”

In my eyes, earthquake is one word.

How quickly do the Republicans forget that Obama’s dimwitted successor spent more time in Crawford than he did in the White House?

Here’s an interesting tidbit as the Republican mo-mos spin their crap:

Bush spent 1,020 days of his presidency on vacation. To put this into context, John F. Kennedy spent fewer days in office, 1000, than George W. Bush spent on vacation. Bush spent 487 days at Camp David, 490 days at his Crawford ranch, and 43 days in Kennebunkport. George W. Bush spent 69 days in Crawford during his first year in office. In contrast, according to FactCheck.org, Obama spent all, or part of, 26 days of his first year in office on vacation. This was less than all three previous Republican presidents, Ronald Reagan, George H.W. Bush, and George W. Bush, but more than the two previous Democratic presidents, Jimmy Carter and Bill Clinton.

Now, as for the earthquake claim? Is Obama some sort of a mindreader that he knows when an East Coast earthquake is supposed to happen? Let’s see, the last time one registered 5.9 in this part of the country was May of 1897. Yeah, Obama could predict this one was coming. I don’t even think Dionne Warwick and the Psychic Friends Network could have called this one.

And the last time we had a natural disaster in this country _ YES, REPUBLICANS, ALABAMA, MISSISSIPPI AND LOUISIANA ARE STILL IN THE UNITED STATES at last check _ the president at the time was on vacation in Crawford, Texas, thinking that Hurricane Katrina wasn’t that big of a thing. And we only lost about 3,000 Americans to that storm. Give or take a few hundred.

How many people perished because of the earthquake (still one word)?

I think a lawn chair toppled over in Arlington, Va.

But hey, Brownie, you’re still doing a hell of a job.

I’m not a flag-waver for Obama by any means. I am a Democrat, true and true. But Obama really hasn’t shown me much in his three years of office, except for engineering the raid that brought the demise to that prick Osama bin Laden. So my anger over the last few days has nothing to do with politics, just ignorance.

But wow, these claims by the Tea Party morons and the short-sighted forgetful Republicans are beyond comprehension. How quickly we forget Katrina? I guess since no Republicans died in the aftermath of the storm, it really didn’t happen, right? And the brilliant GWB handled it all so, how do you say, brilliantly, right?

Amazing.

Like the Mets.

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You can read more of my work at http://www.hudsonreporter.com, http://www.theobserver.com and http://www.dailyrecord.com

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Posted on August 24, 2011, in Jim Hague and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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